Inception: A Caper Flick

[selenite0]

"All right, Leonardo, are you in?"

"What's in it for me, Chris?"

"Acting. Action, drama, pathos, multiple characters. This is something you can throw in the face of anyone who ever says 'pretty boy' to you again."

Reads script. "Okay. I'm in. What's the caper?"

"We're going to walk into a Hollywood studio and take $200,000,000."

"For this?" Waves script. "You gotta be kidding me. Psychological manipulation, multiple story layers, the whole plot hinging on someone's father issues . . . no way you get that kind of money for this."

"We will. Your job is to make sure they never look at the script."

"Never?"

"That's right. They ask about effects, you show them windows blowing up around people who aren't affected at all. The moment someone touches the script you signal the skiers with machine guns to zoom by. They try to open it, car chase. They want something special, zero gee fight in a hotel hallway."

"That ain't gonna distract all of them."

"Oh, there's more distractions. Someone asks about the women's angle you talk about being a widower longing to get back to his cute little tykes. Talk up the evil corporations if there's someone political there. Location shoots in places they want to visit. And if they ask about the ending . . . "

"Yeah?"

"Just say 'Lady and the Tiger.'"

"Let's do it."